The text is a transcript of a video game commentary, where two players are controlling ducks and trying to complete various tasks while annoying a gardener. They have to steal his keys, hat, radio and other items, and throw them into a pond or a picnic area. They also have to make him wet, hammer his thumb and wear a different hat. They are very excited and chaotic, and they often make jokes and kiss each other. They explain that the game has more levels and missions, but they are not sure if they will continue playing.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. A person warns against kissing because it angers their mother.
2. The game involves ducks that are characterized as evil and annoying.
3. The objective of the game includes tasks like wetting the gardener and stealing keys.
4. The gardener is referred to as human rubbish and a rival father.
5. Ducks are compared to honey badgers, indicating they don't care about consequences.
6. A romantic picnic is planned, similar to Donald Duck.
7. There's a mention of using a controller and a keyboard for the game.
8. The gardener needs to be lured out for an unspecified reason.
9. There's confusion about the actions of a character named Massimo and the gardener's life.
10. The garden is entered stealthily to steal things.
11. Items for a picnic, such as jam, apples, pumpkin, carrot, thermos, radio, and sandwich, are listed.
12. There's an intention to make the gardener wet using a fountain.
13. The gardener's keys are stolen with a plan to escape into the sea.
14. There's a repeated emphasis on escaping and sneaking around.
15. The characters express frustration and confusion during their actions.
Please note that this is a simplified list of facts based on the provided text, which seems to be a transcript of gameplay involving ducks causing mischief in a garden setting. If you need more details or have specific parts of the text you want to focus on, let me know!