The passage describes a person participating in a Super Smash Bros tournament, forming a team with another player named Jaden. The tournament pairs top players with content creators. They face various opponents and employ strategic tactics, but ultimately, they don't win the tournament. The narrator humorously expresses disappointment with the outcome and vents on Twitter.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text without opinions:
**Facts from the First Part:**
1. The author entered a Smash tournament with Jaden, who doesn't play Smash much.
2. In the tournament, seven top players were paired with content creators.
3. The match ends when the VIP loses their stocks.
4. The author considered themselves the eighth-best player.
5. The opponents in the first match were Wadi and Captain Kid.
6. They played on fun stages initially but eventually played on a tournament-legal stage.
7. In the second match, they faced Boyd and Aru.
8. The author realized the tournament format was challenging.
9. In the third match, they faced Aaron and Grand Poo Bear.
10. They won a match against Aaron and Grand Poo Bear.
11. They had a chance to make it to the finals if they stayed undefeated.
**Facts from the Second Part:**
12. The author and Jaden played a fun, turn-based RPG while waiting for their final match.
13. Their final match was against Yani and Trihex.
14. Yani was a phenomenal Steve player.
15. The author tried to strategize with Jaden in the final match.
16. They played on a tournament-legal stage.
**Facts from the Third Part:**
17. The final match resulted in a three-way tie for second place.
18. A three-person free-for-all was played with Jaden, Ross, and Trihex.
19. The author told Jaden to team up with Ross.
20. They watched a chaotic and poorly played match.
21. Eventually, the two Smash content creators won the tournament.
22. The author expressed dissatisfaction with the tournament on Twitter.
These are the factual points extracted from the text without including opinions or subjective statements.