The text describes a review of two vintage Transformers games, one for the Commodore 64 and another for the Nintendo Famicom (Japan's version of the NES). The reviewer is highly critical of both games, calling them "shitty" and expressing frustration with their poor gameplay, lack of action, and weak connection to the Transformers franchise.
The Commodore 64 game is described as a strategic simulation that requires players to use key commands to move Autobots around, with a first-person battle mode that becomes monotonous quickly. The reviewer also notes that the game has poor graphics and sound.
The Famicom game, titled "Mystery of Optimus Prime," is described as a side-scroller with poor controls, limited continues, and a high level of difficulty that makes it nearly impossible to progress. The reviewer criticizes the game's design, including its use of the same boss multiple times and its lack of connection to the Transformers franchise.
The reviewer concludes that both games are poorly made and that it's no wonder the Famicom game was never released outside of Japan.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. There is a Transformers game for the Commodore 64.
2. The game has a long loading time and a hypnotic light show before the title screen appears.
3. The game allows players to choose an Autobot to play as, but Optimus Prime is not an option.
4. The game uses key commands to move Autobots to different locations.
5. The game has a first-person view for battles, but it can get monotonous.
6. There is a Transformers game for the Nintendo Famicom that was only released in Japan.
7. The Famicom game is a side-scroller and has a different format than the Commodore 64 game.
8. The Famicom game has a title that translates to "Mystery of Optimus Prime".
9. The game has a limited number of lives and no continues or checkpoints.
10. The game has a biased detection system that makes it hard to avoid enemies.
11. The game has a lot of projectiles and fast-moving enemies that can be hard to dodge.
12. The game has a "transform" command, but it's not very useful.
13. The game has a secret level (Stage 9) that requires a specific pattern to complete.
14. The game has a final boss that is not Megatron, but rather a Godzilla-like creature.
15. The game's music is not very memorable and does not match the Transformers theme.
16. The game's bosses are not very creative and include the Decepticon logo three times.
17. The game's Autobot selection is limited and mostly text-based.
18. The game's levels are mostly the same with slight modifications.
19. The game's difficulty is very high, making it not suitable for gamers or Transformers fans.