The text is a sarcastic and humorous review of the video game "Elden Ring" by a person named Sseth. He pretends to be a hardcore gamer and makes fun of the game's mechanics, difficulty, and community. Sseth also jokes about the game's lore, characters, and From Software's writing style.
He criticizes the game's storytelling, saying it's "passive" and relies on players piecing together random notes to understand the plot. He also mocks the game's community, saying they're elitist and judgmental towards "casual" players.
Throughout the review, Sseth uses satire and irony to poke fun at the game and its fans. He also includes humorous anecdotes and fictional stories to add to the comedic tone.
Ultimately, Sseth concludes that "Elden Ring" is a flawed but enjoyable game, and that its community is comprised of both passionate fans and toxic elitists. He ends the review with a tongue-in-cheek rating of "10/10 Garbage" and a joke about dropping bombs.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. The speaker is discussing the game Elden Ring.
2. Elden Ring is a game developed by From Software.
3. Hideo Miyazaki is not associated with Elden Ring, he is actually the co-founder of Studio Ghibli.
4. The speaker's character in Elden Ring is named Sambubu.
5. Sambubu's class is Wretched.
6. The speaker chose the key as their starting item in the game.
7. The speaker encountered a side dungeon early in the game.
8. The speaker killed Morgott and Godrick without leveling up.
9. The speaker did not accept Melina's accord.
10. George R. R. Martin is involved in the game's narrative.
11. The game has a feature called Torrent, which is a mount.
12. The game has a multiplayer feature that allows players to interact with each other.
13. The speaker believes that pattern recognition is a form of cheating.
14. The speaker suggests that a lobotomite run, where the player performs a frontal lobotomy before playing, would be a more authentic experience.
15. The speaker criticizes the game's difficulty, saying it's not hard, but rather that the circumstances of life are hard.
16. The speaker mentions that some boss fights have "interesting" hitboxes.
17. The speaker discusses the game's lore and characters, including Dung Eater.
18. The speaker mentions that there are many builds in the game, including Strength, Dexterity, Intelligence, and Faith.
19. The speaker abuses game mechanics and exploits to gain an advantage.
20. The speaker is sponsored by Thughunters.com.
21. The video is concluded with a message thanking the merchants guild for funding and a warning not to call a certain phone number.