The passage is a transcript of a video documentary featuring a wealthy, arrogant, and entitled man, Mr. Goodman, showcasing his daily life. He is extremely demanding and abusive to his butler, Chives, and treats others with disdain.
The day begins with Mr. Goodman waking up, having Chives assist him with his bath, and then having a luxurious breakfast. He spends his day playing golf, using his private jet, and visiting a neighbor to collect a house payment.
Throughout the day, Mr. Goodman is rude and dismissive to those around him, including Chives, his maid, and his son. He is obsessed with his wealth and status, often boasting about his possessions and expensive lifestyle.
The documentary also shows Mr. Goodman's eccentricities, such as his desire for a woman to shave her head and wear a monocle, and his request for Chives to eat a worm from his putting green.
The passage ends with Mr. Goodman cuddling with Chives, who is forced to spoon him, and a preview of Mr. Goodman's work life, which is promised to be featured in a future episode.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. Mr. Goodman wakes up every morning at 6am.
2. Mr. Goodman sleeps with his eyes open because he is afraid someone will steal his money if he closes them.
3. Mr. Goodman has a butler named Chives.
4. Mr. Goodman has a maid named Patricia, also known as Quinceanera or Enchilada.
5. Mr. Goodman does not get up to use the bathroom, instead he defecates in his pants.
6. Mr. Goodman has a bath every morning, which costs $15 million.
7. Mr. Goodman wears his suit in the bath to save on laundry.
8. Mr. Goodman has a private jet that he flies around in to think.
9. Mr. Goodman's private jet has seats made of elephant skin.
10. Mr. Goodman has a Lamborghini that he buys a new one every week when the odometer hits 100 miles.
11. Mr. Goodman has a son named Richard.
12. Mr. Goodman has a bank account with one trillion dollars.
13. Mr. Goodman collects house payments from people, including Marvin.
14. Marvin did not pay his house payment, so he has to live under Mr. Goodman's stairs for a few days.
15. Chives has his own room under Mr. Goodman's stairs, like Harry Potter.
16. Mr. Goodman has a pool with a leaf in it, which he wants Chives to remove.
17. Mr. Goodman has a golf ball with a worm on it, which he wants Chives to eat.
18. Mr. Goodman has a habit of spanking Chives.
19. Mr. Goodman likes to have Chives tuck him into bed at night.
20. Mr. Goodman has a bedtime story told to him by Chives, but it was not scary enough.
21. Mr. Goodman wants a lady friend for the night, with a budget of $30,000.
22. Mr. Goodman wants the lady to shave her head and wear a monocle, but then decides to settle for a lady from the previous night.