The provided text appears to be a collection of humorous and unrelated conversations, quotes, and phrases, likely from various social media platforms, videos, or podcasts. The content is lighthearted and comedic, featuring a wide range of topics, including:
* Casual conversations between friends and family members
* Jokes and witty one-liners
* Playful teasing and sarcastic remarks
* References to popular culture, including music and celebrities
* Observations on everyday life, such as relationships, school, and work
The text does not follow a narrative structure or convey a specific message. Instead, it seems to be a compilation of humorous snippets intended to entertain or provide comedic relief.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. 1986 was the year swag was created.
2. The speaker's Snapchat selfie says they are going 65.
3. A character is offered a kids' menu because they are 12 years old.
4. Taylor Swift is mentioned as someone the speaker loves.
5. The speaker says they have to pay taxes and die.
6. A character says they got a PS4.
7. A character says they have to go to the store.
8. A character's mom never cooks dinner because of her job.
9. A character's grandma shows them baby clothes.
10. A character says they got a promotion.
11. A character says they have a new follower on social media.
12. Jennifer Lawrence is mentioned.
13. A character says they broke their leg.
14. A character says they have to go get salads for lunch.
15. A character says they used a math formula to calculate the downhill slope of where their life was headed.
16. A character says they have to meet at page 179.
17. A character says they left their oven on at home.
18. A character says they have to brush their teeth.
19. A character says they have to go to the bathroom.
20. A character says they are allergic to bacon.
21. A character says they have two questions: what Wi-Fi is and where the cookies are.
22. A character says they have to buy someone a drink because their guinea pig died.
23. A character says they are trying to go out and read a text.
24. A character says they have to teach someone how to be ratchet.
25. A character says they are losing their job, but their birthday is tomorrow.
26. A character says they have to collect homework from yesterday.
27. A character says they stayed up until 5:00 a.m. doing homework.
28. A character asks how much bacon a family needs.
29. A character says they got laid for the first time.