The text is a transcript of a stand-up comedy show by a Brazilian comedian named Afonso Padilha, who talks about his experience of traveling to Portugal and Ireland. He makes jokes about the differences between the languages, cultures, and immigration policies of the countries. He also mentions some of the threats he received from Portuguese people who did not like his jokes. He uses a lot of slang, swear words, and references to Brazilian and Portuguese celebrities and media. A possible summary is:
Afonso Padilha is a Brazilian comedian who performs in Portugal and Ireland. He humorously compares the languages, cultures, and immigration policies of the countries and tells stories about the threats he received from Portuguese people who did not like his jokes.
1. The speaker is performing a comedy show in Portugal.
2. The speaker mentions that 65-70% of the audience is Portuguese, 20% Brazilian, and 10% are afraid to clap and say they are Brazilian.
3. The speaker jokes that if Brazilians were to take over Portugal, it would be like a poor man adopting a golden retriever.
4. The speaker was initially afraid to perform in Portugal due to receiving threats from some Portuguese people.
5. The speaker mentions that they were nervous about passing through immigration in Portugal.
6. The speaker notes that the Portuguese immigration process is different from the Brazilian process.
7. The speaker jokes about the differences in language between Portuguese and Brazilian Portuguese.
8. The speaker mentions that they were able to eat at a restaurant in Porto that was popular with older people.
9. The speaker jokes about the differences in food terminology between Portuguese and Brazilian Portuguese.
10. The speaker performed three sessions with 270 people each in Portugal.
11. The speaker mentions that they were initially afraid to speak English in Portugal, but discovered that there are people who have lived in the country for years and still don't speak English.
12. The speaker jokes about the idea of learning English in Dublin.
13. The speaker mentions that they were able to pierce their "bubble" and experience a new culture in Portugal.
14. The speaker performed a comedy show in Ireland and was initially afraid of the blonde immigration officer, but discovered that most people in Ireland are blonde or redhead.
15. The speaker jokes about not speaking English and a person responding with a phrase in Portuguese.
16. The speaker mentions that they were able to communicate with a person who only knew a few words of English.
17. The speaker jokes about a person being angry and turning red, but it being a playful anger.
18. The speaker mentions that they were only passing through and would be leaving the next day.