A possible concise summary is:
The speaker ranks the 16 courses in Mario Kart Double Dash, a racing game for the GameCube, from worst to best. He also briefly reviews the six battle mode courses and promotes Squarespace, a website builder. He praises the courses for their creativity, atmosphere, and challenge, and criticizes them for being boring, unfair, or unmemorable. He chooses DK Mountain as his favorite course and Dry Dry Desert as his least favorite. He ends by teasing his future rankings of other Mario Kart games.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. Funding for Shaperless is provided by Squarespace.
2. A video ranking every course in Mario Kart Wii was made in December.
3. Plans to rank every Mario Kart game leading up to a big ranking of all 96 courses in Mario Kart 8 Deluxe were mentioned.
4. The final DLC wave for Mario Kart 8 Deluxe is expected next December.
5. The speaker played a lot of Mario Kart Double Dash in college on a hacked Wii U.
6. Mario Kart Double Dash is praised for its unique controls and character-specific items.
7. Paratroopa is considered a necessary character addition to any Mario Kart game.
8. There are only 16 courses in Mario Kart Double Dash due to the absence of retro tracks.
9. This is the last game in the series not to include retro tracks.
10. Dry Dry Desert is described as boring and lacking unique features.
11. Sherbet Land has an aesthetically appealing wintertime theme but is criticized for its slippery physics.
12. Wario Coliseum's ranking varies greatly among players, and the speaker personally finds it boring despite its steep difficulty curve.
13. The GameCube version of Mario Circuit is less satisfying without the trick system present in Wii.
14. Dino Dino Jungle is considered basic and underwhelming, especially for the Special Cup.
15. Mushroom City is praised for its vibrant atmosphere and multiple routes, making it feel like a real city.
16. Baby Park is described as embodying sheer chaos and testing players' sanity with oversized items and maddening music.
17. Waluigi Stadium is considered exhilaratingly fun with creative obstacles and a killer extreme sports atmosphere.
18. DK Mountain is highlighted as a thrill ride with tight turns, boulders to dodge, and good shortcut opportunities.
Please note that these are factual statements extracted from the provided text, devoid of any opinions or subjective commentary.