The summary is:
The text is a humorous and critical recap of the movie John Wick, where a retired hitman seeks revenge on the son of a Russian mob boss who killed his dog and stole his car. The text highlights the plot holes, inconsistencies, and unrealistic actions of the characters, while also praising the action scenes and the style of the movie. The text ends with a rating of 10 staplers out of 10 Air.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
- The text is a summary of the movie John Wick, with some humorous commentary and criticism.
- John Wick is a retired hitman who seeks revenge on the son of a Russian mob boss who killed his dog and stole his car.
- John Wick uses his skills and connections to the Continental, a hotel chain for criminals, to track down and kill his enemies.
- John Wick is helped by Marcus, his old friend and fellow hitman, who saves him from being killed several times.
- John Wick faces many obstacles and challenges, such as breaking the rules of the Continental, fighting against a large number of guards, and surviving a car crash.
- John Wick succeeds in killing the son and the father of the mob boss, and adopts a new dog from a vet.