The provided text appears to be a transcript of a video or audio recording, possibly a stand-up comedy routine or a podcast episode. The speaker seems to be sharing a series of personal anecdotes, often in a humorous or exaggerated manner.
The speaker begins by recalling a day seven years ago and expressing frustration with the current state of their life. They mention wanting a T-shirt and a cosmetic bag, and expressing a desire for a "cool life," despite not having money. The speaker also mentions a promotion for a "rocket bank card," which comes with a sticker pack and a chance to win prizes.
The speaker then shares a series of humorous and embarrassing stories from their past, including a story about accidentally buying men's diapers instead of dog diapers, a story about a drunken incident on a train, and a story about a sexual encounter that resulted in a messy scene.
The speaker also shares a story about a time they were invited to speak at a wedding and gave a speech about the unity of different nationalities. They also share a story about a doctor's assistant who was angry with them for making a joke during a difficult time.
The speaker concludes by expressing a desire to leave their current job and pursue a career in comedy, despite not having a medical degree. They also mention a promotion for a "rocket bank card" again, and express a desire to win prizes.
Overall, the speaker uses humor and exaggeration to share personal stories and express frustrations, often with a comedic or satirical tone.
1. The speaker is discussing a day seven years ago when they were looking for something.
2. They mention a disgusting story and a credo.
3. They want a T-shirt and a cosmetic bag, but they don't know why.
4. They mention a rocket bank card and a sticker pack.
5. They mention a person named Mark moving to a new office and giving out prizes.
6. They mention a link in the description to order a card.
7. They mention a story about a dog named Peter and a girlfriend who took the dog.
8. They mention a story about a train ride to the city of Neryungri.
9. They mention a story about a young lady and a man who consumed alcoholic products.
10. They mention a story about a concert in Volgograd and a toilet incident.
11. They mention a story about a toilet in a pharmacy in Kiev.
12. They mention a story about a party at a friend's house where they got very drunk.
13. They mention a story about a hotel room incident with a girl.
14. They mention a story about a sports store incident with two springs.
15. They mention a story about a checkout in a children's world of adults.
16. They mention a story about a doctor's assistant who didn't work as a doctor's assistant.
17. They mention a story about a relative who died during an operation.
18. They mention a story about a woman who came out of an operating room crying.
19. They mention a story about a relative who died and was scalped.
20. They mention a story about a cartoon they left.
21. They mention a story about a person named Vali who trawled.
22. They mention a story about a woman who cried like a thread.
23. They mention a story about a man who took a scalpie.
24. They mention a story about a woman who came out of an operating room crying.
25. They mention a story about a relative who died during an operation.
26. They mention a story about a relative who died and was scalped.
27. They mention a story about a cartoon they left.
28. They mention a story about a person named Vali who trawled.
29. They mention a story about a woman who cried like a thread.
30. They mention a story about a man who took a scalpie.