The text appears to be a humorous and satirical account of the speaker's hospital stay following an appendicitis surgery. The speaker starts by expressing annoyance at the holiday season, when everyone asks for gift suggestions. He then moves on to discuss the strangeness of gift shopping, particularly at a store selling "nonsensical" items.
The speaker then transitions into a story about his hospital stay, describing the inconvenience and discomfort of being admitted to a free hospital. He recounts his interactions with the doctors and nurses, highlighting their work ethic and the stress they face, especially during holidays. He also humorously describes the process of signing papers related to his surgery and the mundane tasks performed by nurses.
The speaker also shares his experiences with the anesthesiologist, describing the uncomfortable and awkward situation. He humorously recounts the argument between the surgeon and the nurse, highlighting the chaos and confusion in the operating room.
The speaker concludes by expressing relief after his surgery and the subsequent complications that arose due to the lack of a proper doctor. He humorously recounts his interactions with the duty teams and the discomfort he experienced due to swelling. He ends by wishing everyone a happy New Year and expresses relief at waking up from his ordeal.
1. The speaker is expressing frustration with the holiday season, stating that it's annoying when people ask for gift recommendations when they already have everything they need.
2. The speaker lists a variety of items they don't own, including an apartment, car, Bitcoin, quadcopter, sensor, and wine stand.
3. The speaker mentions a promotion from the Megafon company, where buying a Technocommund 19 smartphone gets the buyer a free Technospark Go smartphone as a gift.
4. The speaker discusses a humorous encounter with a nurse who shaved their pubic hair, leading to a series of embarrassing situations.
5. The speaker undergoes an appendicitis operation, describing the process in detail, from the initial pain to the post-operation recovery.
6. The speaker expresses concern about complications from the operation due to improper medical attention.
7. The speaker wakes up from a deep sleep on January 6, and finds themselves swollen and in pain.
8. The speaker receives a visit from a priest who brings chocolates and shawarma to the hospital, indicating a lack of proper medical care.
9. The speaker, with a sense of humor, jokes about the situation, sparking laughter from the audience.