The given text appears to be a humorous segment discussing various court cases around the world. The host, Lucas Marques, presents a range of bizarre and amusing legal situations, such as a man who sued himself for $5 million after getting drunk and claiming he violated his civil and religious rights. Another case involves a woman who sued the restaurant where she had entered a bathroom, claiming the restaurant was a football stadium. A former German football player also sued a 19-year-old woman for refusing to marry him because of Dadaism. A Canadian couple's divorce was complicated when the man sued the woman for wanting his kidney back, which he had donated to her three years prior. Other cases involve a man who sued for damages after being injured while trying to escape prison, a man who sued a restaurant for trespassing on his property, and a woman who sued her husband for giving birth to an ugly son. The segment ends with a joke about a man who sued because he thought his prayers were being ignored.
1. The speaker is Lucas Marques and he's discussing some of the funniest and unbelievable court cases in the world.
2. In one case, a man named Jonathan claimed that he couldn't work because he was drunk and was arrested. He then sued the government to pay 5 billion reais, claiming that he was unable to work and was already in a loss.
3. Another case involved Isabelle, who sued for 250 million dollars, claiming that Tim was going to produce a film based on her life. She also claimed that Warner copied the life of a person and a city.
4. In another case, the mayor of a city in Turkey tried to prosecute a death for using the word "beat" even without a definition.
5. There's a case about a man who looked like the basketball player Michael Jordan and claimed that Italy scored goals for five games in 2006 and sued Michael Jordan for 416 million dollars.
6. There's a case of a thief who stole 24 million dollars worth of paintings from the German art museum and sued the museum after he was arrested.
7. There's a case of a man who sued his wife for 5.4 million dollars, claiming that she ran away with a football stadium.
8. There's a case of a man who sued a woman for entering her bathroom and claimed that he was robbed.
9. There's a case of a man who sued a woman for not allowing him to use the toilet and claimed that she owed him 2,000 dollars.
10. There's a case of a man who sued a woman for making a piece of watermelon that didn't fit her.
11. There's a case of a man who claimed that he was robbed by a pimp on a board game and sued the game for 100 million dollars.
12. There's a case of a man who claimed that he was robbed by a Nike game and sued the game for a large sum of money.