This is Why You Never Mess With a Royal Guard... - Summary

Summary

Here is a concise summary of the Royal Guard's secrets and realities:

**Who They Are:**
The Royal Guard, an ancient order of England's most trustworthy and highly-trained soldiers, sworn to protect the British Monarch at all costs.

**Key Facts:**

1. **Elite Selection:** Minimum 5'10" height requirement, decorated members of exclusive British Army regiments, and hand-picked for the role.
2. **Restrictive Duty:**
* Remain motionless and expressionless, even in extreme situations.
* Smiling or laughing can result in military prison.
3. **Consequences of Messing with Them:**
* Physical takedown with explosive force if touched or violently threatened.
* Assaulting a guard can lead to severe injury and hospitalization.
4. **Unyielding Commitment:**
* Guards never abandon their post, even for bathroom breaks (holding it for up to 2 hours).
* Breaches of duty result in imprisonment.
5. **Physical Endurance:**
* Wear heavy uniforms (up to 8 pounds) and bearskin hats (5-13 pounds) in all weather conditions.
* Develop exceptionally strong necks to support the weight.
6. **Most Astonishing Fact:**
* Guards are trained to "Faint to Attention," maintaining posture even when passing out from heat stroke, and quickly resume duty after recovering.

Facts

Here are the key facts extracted from the text, numbered and in short sentences:

1. **Height Requirement**: Queen's Guards must be at least 5 feet 10 inches tall (previously 6 feet 2 inches).
2. **Regiment Requirement**: Guardsmen must be from one of the 7 most exclusive regiments of the British Army, by recommendation only.
3. **Royal Guard History**: The Royal Guard's history dates back to at least 1660.
4. **Monarch Protection**: The Royal Guard's primary duty is to protect the British Monarch at all costs.
5. **Queen's Reign**: Queen Elizabeth II has been the monarch since 1952, with over 62 years of reign.
6. **Generations of Guards**: Over 10 generations of active-duty guardsmen have served during Queen Elizabeth II's reign.
7. **Historical Power**: In the past, the British monarch held absolute power, necessitating high security.
8. **Military Victories**: The Royal Guard has contributed to some of England's greatest military victories.
9. **Selection Criteria**: Only the highest-performing officers and military personnel are considered for the Queen's Guard.
10. **Duty Restrictions**: Guardsmen cannot react or respond to the public unless physically touched or violently threatened.
11. **Consequence of Smiling**: Smiling while on duty can result in a guardsman being sent to a military prison.
12. **Shift Duration**: A guard's shift typically lasts 2 hours of standing and 4 hours of patrol and other duties.
13. **Bathroom Breaks**: Guardsmen are not allowed to abandon their post for bathroom breaks and must hold it for the entirety of their shift.
14. **Uniform Weight**: The coat can weigh up to 8 pounds, and the bearskin hat can weigh between 5 and 13 pounds.
15. **Uniform Significance**: The uniforms represent the royal colors of England and are worn regardless of the weather.
16. **Neck Strength**: Guards develop exceptionally strong necks from wearing the heavy bearskin hats.
17. **Fainting Incidents**: Multiple guards faint every year due to heat stroke from wearing heavy uniforms in hot weather.
18. **Fainting to Attention**: Guards are trained to maintain posture even when fainting, and this phenomenon is seen as a right of passage.