Here is a concise summary of the provided text:
**Title:** Wolverine's Devastating Slap in Round One of the Slapping Championship
**Summary:**
* The narrator shares footage of Round One of the Slapping Championship, featuring Wolverine (the eventual champion) vs. Archaic Death.
* Wolverine "vaporizes" Archaic Death with a single, extremely powerful slap, knocking him out cold.
* The narrator mocks Archaic Death's nickname, suggesting more intimidating alternatives.
* Commentary highlights the absurdity of the event, questionable nickname choices, and potentially inaccurate subtitles.
* Despite Archaic Death landing one shot, Wolverine delivers a brutal knockout slap, leaving his opponent unresponsive for the remainder of the match.
* Post-match, Wolverine shows remorse for unleashing too much power, displaying a "heart of gold" amidst his extraordinary slapping abilities.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text, without opinions, with each fact given a number and kept as short sentences:
1. **Event Context**: The event is a slapping tournament, specifically Round One.
2. **Competitors**: The two competitors are "Wolverine" and "Archaic Death".
3. **Previous Encounter**: Wolverine defeated Archaic Death in an MMA fight about a decade ago.
4. **Match Request**: Archaic Death specifically requested this matchup against Wolverine.
5. **Outcome of Round One**: Wolverine won Round One against Archaic Death with a knockout slap.
6. **Method of Victory**: The knockout occurred from a single, extremely powerful slap by Wolverine.
7. **Injury and Aftermath**: Archaic Death was severely knocked out, requiring paramedic attention, but is reportedly okay now.
8. **Wolverine's Reaction**: After the knockout, Wolverine showed remorse for the intensity of his slap.
9. **Previous Event Mentioned**: The audience had previously seen Wolverine win the Light Heavyweight Championship.
10. **Location Mentioned**: The event is noted to be in Missouri, in the context of the slapping tournament.