Here is a concise summary of the provided transcript:
**Title:** "Every Substitute Teacher Ever"
**Summary:**
A humorous, satirical transcript depicting a chaotic classroom with a eccentric substitute teacher, Mr. Grubb (also known as "Lil Sub"). The teacher:
* Introduces themselves with a bizarre, attention-seeking monologue
* Fails to maintain order, engaging in absurd conversations with students
* Reveals unconventional aspects of their life, including working for a weed delivery dispensary
* Gets fired by the principal due to this revelation
* Continues to teach, embracing chaos and doing the bare minimum
* Eventually gets dismissed but claims victory as a "renegade"
* Ends with a series of nonsensical, fantastical claims and a failed attempt to save their job with a kickflip.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text, excluding opinions, with each fact numbered and in short sentences:
1. **Substitute Teacher**: Mr. Carson is ill, and the class has a substitute teacher.
2. **Substitute Teacher's Name**: The substitute teacher's name is Ryan, also referred to as "Lil Sub".
3. **Relationship to Mr. Carson**: Mr. Carson is the substitute teacher's (Ryan's) dad.
4. **Class Chapter**: The class is currently on Chapter 4.
5. **Substitute Teacher's Other Job**: The substitute teacher (Ryan) works for a dispensary, delivering weed (legally).
6. **School Policy**: Teachers are not allowed to work in the weed industry, according to school policy.
7. **Principal's Name**: The principal's name is Mr. Palm.
8. **Disciplinary Action**: The principal threatens to fire the substitute teacher and confiscate his skateboard.
9. **Student Homework**: Students are initially not required to do homework by the substitute teacher.
10. **Class Subject**: The subject of the class is debated among students, with mentions of algebra, trigonometry, and a possible misinterpretation of the class being Spanish.
11. **Substitute Teacher's Fate**: The substitute teacher is eventually fired.
12. **Student Interaction**: The substitute teacher interacts with students, knowing some of their personal details, implying informants within the class.
13. **School Environment**: The school has a strict dismissal policy, enforced by the substitute teacher before the actual bell rings.