Stephen Colbert opens his show by discussing Donald Trump's recent visit to Louisiana, where he was greeted by the Lieutenant Governor with "Trump socks." Colbert mocks Trump's statement about China, joking that he's not worried about the trade war. The Late Show then cuts to a segment about Trump's latest tweets, where he claims the US will "make a deal" with China. Colbert sarcastically responds, saying Trump's friendship and respect for China's President Xi is "unlimited," but he won't even say that about his wives.
The show also tackles the topic of the trade war, with Trump imposing 25% tariffs on $200 billion worth of Chinese goods. China retaliated with tariffs on $60 billion of American products, including beer, wine, and swimsuits. Colbert jokes that this is the "new MTV show: Spring Break Shanghai: Sober and Naked."
Additionally, Colbert discusses Trump's claim that Americans can avoid paying tariffs by simply building or making their products in the US. Colbert points out that this is not a realistic solution, as many products are made in China. He also mocks Trump's promise to farmers, saying they will be "one of the biggest beneficiaries" of the trade war.
The show also features a segment on Arkansas Senator Tom Cotton, who was asked about the sacrifices farmers are making due to the trade war. Cotton responds by saying the sacrifices are "minimal" compared to those made by soldiers overseas. Colbert calls this response "weird" and jokes that it's a way for Cotton to avoid answering the question.
Finally, the show touches on the escalating tensions with Iran, with Trump's national security advisors proposing a plan to deploy 120,000 troops. Colbert jokes that Trump is starting a "cupcake war" and that he will deploy 120,000 cupcakes to the "troubled region" of his mouth.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. Stephen Colbert is the host of "The Late Show".
2. Donald Trump was not in Washington, but in Louisiana.
3. Trump was greeted by the Louisiana Lieutenant Governor with Trump-themed socks.
4. Trump imposed 25% tariffs on $200 billion worth of Chinese goods.
5. China retaliated with tariffs on $60 billion of American products, including beer, wine, and swimsuits.
6. The Trump administration is considering imposing tariffs on nearly every consumer product left untouched by previous tariffs, including cell phones, laptops, and tablet computers.
7. Trump claimed that Americans can avoid paying tariffs by building or making products in the United States.
8. Trump tweeted that the US will make a deal with China when the time is right.
9. Trump referred to the trade war with China as a "little squabble".
10. China has had tariffs on agricultural products for almost a year.
11. Trump promised farmers $15 billion in subsidies to replace the money China would have spent on farm products.
12. Senator Tom Cotton was asked about the sacrifice farmers are making and compared it to the sacrifices made by soldiers overseas.
13. Tensions have been escalating between the US and Iran since Trump pulled out of the Iran nuclear deal.
14. Trump's national security advisors have come up with a plan to deploy as many as 120,000 troops to the Middle East.
15. Trump denied plans to send 120,000 troops to the Middle East, calling it "fake news".