The author discusses their disappointment with the state of Cheetos in Russia, specifically the lack of the "original" crunchy Cheetos and the abundance of puffed Cheetos. They express frustration with the Russian Cheetos' experiments with flavors, such as crab stick flavor, and their attempt to appeal to children with sweet flavors and childish advertising. The author also jokes about the potential for Cheetos to produce even more ridiculous flavors, such as Cheetos-flavored Cheetos. They criticize the Russian Cheetos' mascot, Chester, for being "creepy" and outdated.
The author also discovers a rival snack brand called Chipas, which is exclusively sold in southern Russia and has a similar branding and social media presence. They express surprise that Chipas has not been sued for plagiarism and wonder if it could potentially "destroy" the original Cheetos.
Ultimately, the author calls on the Russian Cheetos division to produce the original crunchy Cheetos and to improve their branding and advertising. They also invite Cheetos and Chipas to collaborate on a project.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. Cheetos were invented in the USA in 1948.
2. There are two versions of Cheetos: Cheetos Puffs and Cheetos Crunchy.
3. Cheetos Puffs were introduced in Russia in the 1990s.
4. Cheetos Crunchy was not widely available in Russia.
5. The original flavors of Cheetos in Russia were Cheese, Bacon, and Peanut.
6. Cheetos periodically released special edition flavors and promotions in Russia.
7. One of the promotions included Pokemon tattoos inside Cheetos bags.
8. Cheetos also released Lego Bionicles, Simpsons, and Shrek-themed caps.
9. The caps became a popular collectible item among children in Russia.
10. Cheetos introduced a new line of flavors in the early 2000s, including cheese, ketchup, and pizza.
11. The pizza flavor was later discontinued.
12. Cheetos also released sweet flavors, including chocolate-filled Cheetos, but they were not well-received.
13. The Russian division of Frito-Lay or Pepsi Food is responsible for Cheetos in Russia.
14. Chipas is a separate brand of cheese puffs that is sold exclusively in the southern part of Russia.
15. Chipas has a social media presence and targets teenagers with its marketing.
16. Some people import Cheetos Crunchy from other countries into Russia.