How to stop being unconfident - Summary

Summary

The speaker argues that many people struggle with feelings of inauthenticity and low self-esteem due to a disconnect between the person they present to the world and who they truly are. This is often a result of trying to project confidence and self-assurance to others, while secretly feeling uncertain or insecure.

The root of this issue lies in the subconscious mind, which constantly observes and judges our thoughts, words, and actions, just as it would with others. When our behavior contradicts our values and ideals, our subconscious develops a negative opinion of ourselves, leading to low self-esteem and confidence.

To overcome this, the speaker suggests developing a better relationship with our subconscious by getting to know ourselves and our values. This can be achieved by asking ourselves key questions, such as what kind of person we want to be and how we want to live our lives. By aligning our behavior with our values and ideals, we can develop a more authentic sense of self and build confidence.

Ultimately, the speaker emphasizes that true confidence comes from being unapologetically ourselves, both in the presence of others and when alone. By embracing our true nature and living in accordance with our values, we can cultivate a sense of self-assurance that is not dependent on external validation.

Facts

Here are the key facts extracted from the text:

1. People tend to judge others based on their appearance and behavior.
2. Our brain uses the same mechanism to judge ourselves as it does to judge others.
3. Our subconscious mind constantly observes and judges our thoughts, words, and actions.
4. Our subconscious mind influences our mood, mindset, and overall mental state.
5. Our subconscious accounts for over 90% of our overall mental function.
6. Our behaviors and values need to match in order to develop a better opinion of ourselves.
7. Our subconscious mind compares our behavior to our ideals and values.
8. It's essential to take time to figure out what constitutes a good and honorable person according to our own values and ideals.
9. Writing down our thoughts and values can help us uncover our underlying beliefs and ideals.
10. Seeking the help of a therapist or mental health professional can help us evaluate and adjust our values and behaviors.
11. When our conscious and subconscious minds are aligned, we tend to be more consistent and authentic in our behavior.
12. Confidence is not just about how we appear to others, but also about being true to ourselves.
13. Developing a better relationship with our subconscious mind can lead to increased self-awareness and self-acceptance.
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