The text is a stand-up comedy routine where the comedian talks about various aspects of their life and observations. They discuss how they sometimes feel disconnected from their black identity, share a story about saving a stranger's life, and then being rough with an old lady to prevent themselves from falling.
The comedian also talks about being broken up with via text message while dealing with food poisoning, and the absurdity of seeing an Uber driver's location and route on the app. They suggest that this feature is a bad idea, as it can lead to anxiety and judgment of the driver's navigation skills.
Additionally, the comedian touches on their personal life, mentioning that they have autism and that living alone for too long can lead to a downward spiral. They jokingly talk about their experiences with dating, getting gifts from friends to keep them alive, and the need for a girlfriend or roommate to bring them back to reality.
Throughout the routine, the comedian uses humor and self-deprecation to share their thoughts and observations on life, relationships, and modern technology.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. The speaker saved a man's life by tackling him out of the way of a car in New York.
2. The speaker has food poisoning and is experiencing diarrhea.
3. The speaker received a wrong number text message breaking up with them.
4. The speaker responded to the wrong number text message as if it was real.
5. The speaker thinks black mothers would not tolerate possessed or haunted children in horror movies.
6. The speaker was fired from a gang for being too positive.
7. The speaker was also kicked out of the gang for apologizing too much.
8. The speaker thinks Uber drivers should not be tracked on the app while driving to pick up passengers.
9. The speaker took an Uber to get to their current location.
10. The speaker has lived alone for a long time and thinks it has had a negative impact on their mental health.
11. The speaker believes that living alone can be liberating at first but can lead to depression later on.
12. The speaker's friends gave them gifts to try to keep them alive during a depressing period.
13. The speaker has done unusual things while living alone, such as getting in the shower with an umbrella.