The passage is a humorous, modern retelling of the biblical story of creation and the fall of man. The "god" in this story is a somewhat eccentric and egotistical character who creates the world and its inhabitants, including Adam and Eve. God explains to Adam that he can eat any fruit in the garden except for the apples from a specific tree, warning him that eating an apple will result in severe punishment.
However, a dinosaur (who was not killed by God's earlier meteorite attack) disguises itself as a bear or a snake and convinces Eve to eat an apple. As a result, God punishes Adam and Eve, and by extension, all of humanity, with suffering and mortality. The story is a comedic take on the traditional biblical narrative, with God's character adding a humorous twist to the classic tale.
Here are the key facts from the text:
1. A being claims to have created another being and is discussing their creation with it.
2. The creator being throws a meteorite at dinosaurs.
3. The creator being is told that 5 million 793 thousand meteorites have been thrown at dinosaurs.
4. The creator being creates a being called Adam.
5. The creator being creates a being called Eva (also referred to as Eba).
6. The creator being tells Adam and Eva not to eat the apples from a specific tree.
7. The creator being explains that eating the apples would be a test of their fidelity.
8. A dinosaur appears and claims to have been hit by a meteorite thrown by the creator being.
9. The dinosaur says it survived and hid, and then traveled to the garden where Adam and Eva live.
10. Eva eats an apple from the forbidden tree.
11. The creator being is angry with Eva for eating the apple.
12. A snake is revealed to be the one who tricked Eva into eating the apple.
13. The creator being punishes Adam and Eva for eating the apple.
14. The punishment is that humanity will suffer for life.
15. The creator being says that Adam and Eva will die.
Note: Some parts of the text are unclear or open to interpretation, but these facts are the most concrete and objective points that can be extracted from the text.