In a post-apocalyptic world overrun by zombies, Mario and Luigi, two Italian plumbers, navigate a treacherous environment in search of right boots. They team up with others, including Sark, and make their way to an outpost that supposedly has the boots they need. However, upon arrival, they discover it's a lie and all the boots are left-footed. As they try to escape the zombies, they devise a plan to escape using a plane. After a series of intense battles and close calls, they manage to board the plane but not without sustaining injuries.
Here are the key facts from the text:
1. The zombie apocalypse started three months ago.
2. The narrator is living with Mario and Luigi, two Italian plumbers.
3. They are in a crowded and dirty living space with limited resources.
4. Mario is 57 years old and used to be a plumber.
5. There is a zombie outbreak outside their living space.
6. The group has access to some military equipment, including grenades and guns.
7. They plan to escape to a safe house.
8. The safe house has a C4 explosive with a two-mile blast radius.
9. The group hears a beeping sound and realizes they need to escape.
10. They plan to head to an outpost 700 miles west to find right boots.
11. However, they discover that they went to the wrong outpost and the boots they found are all left boots.
12. The group comes up with a new escape plan, which involves jumping down and running to a new location.
13. They eventually find a plane and use it to escape the zombie-infested area.
14. The plane is headed to the "great white North," which they refer to as home.
15. The narrator is injured during the escape and loses his arms and legs.