The comedian shares a series of humorous and sarcastic observations on various topics. He begins by describing a bee that sacrificed itself to sting someone, and wonders why it did so despite knowing it would die. He then talks about his childhood in Boston, where he had to work multiple jobs, including delivering newspapers, and shares a story about a man who lost control of his car in the snow but managed to take a sip of coffee without incident.
The comedian also discusses his love for the TV show Game of Thrones, but criticizes people who claim the books are better. He argues that reading books is not necessarily better than watching TV shows, and that people who say otherwise are just trying to sound smart.
He then talks about his experience as a parent, sharing a story about his daughter's first words and how he decided to treat her as an equal. The comedian also discusses the concept of infinity and how it's often misunderstood. He argues that infinity is not just a big number, but rather a concept that means that everything that has ever happened has happened an infinite number of times in the universe.
The comedian also shares his thoughts on vegans who don't eat honey, calling them "ridiculous" and arguing that bees are not exploited for their honey. He then talks about his experience with people who claim to have seen Bigfoot, sharing a story about a man who claimed to have seen the creature and describing the Patterson footage, a famous video that claims to show Bigfoot. The comedian is skeptical of the footage and argues that it's likely a hoax.
1. The speaker grew up in Boston.
2. The speaker used to deliver newspapers.
3. The speaker worked 365 days a year.
4. The speaker was 19 years old when they saw a man lose control of his car on a snowy road.
5. The man in the car took a sip of coffee and continued driving.
6. The speaker hates it when people tell them to read the books after watching a TV show.
7. The speaker thinks that people who say "the book is better" just want to show off that they've read the book.
8. The speaker loves the TV show Game of Thrones.
9. The speaker thinks that Colorado is cold.
10. Colorado has legal weed.
11. The speaker thinks that people who are against weed are the ones who need it the most.
12. The speaker used to think of animals as just animals, but now they see them as unique and individual.
13. The speaker has kids, not babies.
14. The speaker's daughter spoke up at the age of three and questioned why she had to go to bed.
15. The speaker decided to treat their daughter as an equal, but with more information.
16. The speaker told their daughter that she had to go to bed because her mom wouldn't let him near her unless she was asleep.
17. The speaker thinks that people who believe in Bigfoot want to believe, but there's no evidence.
18. The Patterson footage is the most famous evidence of Bigfoot, but it's likely a hoax.
19. Roger Patterson, who filmed the footage, was a known con man.
20. The footage was likely staged, with a man wearing a Bigfoot costume.
21. A man named Bob Hieronymus wore the Bigfoot outfit and passed a lie-detector test saying he wore it.