The speaker shares various stories and anecdotes, often using humor and satire to make points about life, relationships, and society. They start by talking about ordering fries and how it can be a group decision, comparing it to agreeing to take ecstasy. The speaker then shares about their own struggles with drinking and blacking out, and how they had to quit after experiencing problems.
They recall a strange encounter with a woman in a subway station, where she perceived them as a threat and ran away. The speaker reflects on how this experience was both flattering and weird, and how it highlights the societal perception of adults and danger.
The speaker also shares about their relationship with their girlfriend, who is Jewish, and how they appreciate her straightforward communication style. They poke fun at the idea of having a "girlfriend lawyer" who can point out obvious things and provide a new perspective on life.
Additionally, the speaker talks about their experiences with airlines, specifically Delta, and how they've learned to tolerate poor treatment when traveling alone. They also discuss the concept of "jinxing it" when using a microphone in the bathroom and how it affects their behavior.
The speaker then shifts to talking about their favorite show, "The Jinx," and how the main character, Robert Durst, is charismatic and confident despite being a convicted murderer. They compare this to the OJ Simpson trial, which they believe was the most entertaining TV event ever, and how the participants, including Johnny Cochran, delivered impressive performances.
Throughout the monologue, the speaker uses humor, irony, and satire to comment on various aspects of life, relationships, and society.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. The speaker quit drinking a couple of months ago due to blacking out often.
2. The speaker's doctor said that after a couple of major blackouts, it becomes easier to black out again.
3. The speaker feels like a detective trying to solve the mystery of how they got home after a blackout.
4. The speaker had a strange encounter with a woman on the subway who was afraid of them.
5. The speaker was walking behind the woman in a subway tunnel at 2 am when she started running away from them.
6. The speaker realized the woman was running from them because she perceived them as a threat.
7. The speaker has a girlfriend who is Jewish.
8. The speaker likes dating Jewish women because they are open about their thoughts and feelings.
9. The speaker used to put up with bad treatment from others before they had a girlfriend.
10. The speaker's girlfriend helps them navigate everyday situations and points out obvious things.
11. The speaker watched the documentary series "The Jinx" and thinks it's their favorite show.
12. The speaker thinks the main subject of "The Jinx" is charismatic and confident.
13. The speaker's wife said that people are drawn to the main subject of "The Jinx" because of his confidence.
14. The speaker watched the OJ Simpson trial and thought it was entertaining.
15. The speaker thinks Johnny Cochran, one of the lawyers in the OJ Simpson trial, was entertaining but did not receive an Emmy award.
Note that some of these "facts" may be subjective or based on the speaker's opinions, but I've tried to extract the most objective information from the text.