The author, Miguel Román, discusses four phrases that people often say that can hinder their success and relationships with others. He advises against saying:
1. "I'm like that" - This phrase implies that you are not willing to change or improve, which can be off-putting to successful people.
2. "I'll try" - This phrase gives yourself permission to fail and can be seen as a lack of commitment.
3. "I'm pulling" (or similar phrases that downplay one's well-being) - This phrase can attract negative people and energy into your life.
4. "I can't" - This phrase limits your potential and can be replaced with more empowering language.
Additionally, Román advises against saying "it's not my fault" and "more" (or similar phrases that deflect responsibility or lead to defensiveness). He also suggests keeping your goals secret to avoid negative influences and to maintain a "dynamic identity" that allows for growth and change.
Instead of using these phrases, Román recommends responding to "how are you?" with a simple "incredible" to project positivity and confidence. He also encourages listeners to take responsibility for their actions and to focus on finding their "why" to drive motivation and success.
Here are the key facts extracted from the text:
1. The speaker is going to discuss four things that people say that prevent them from achieving success.
2. The first thing to stop saying is "I'm like that," which is seen as a negative phrase that prevents personal growth.
3. Saying "I'm like that" can make you appear unintelligent, recognize your flaws, and unwilling to change.
4. Successful people are eager to improve and do not defend or justify themselves when someone points out their mistakes.
5. The speaker suggests replacing "I'm like that" with a more positive phrase that acknowledges the possibility of change.
6. The second thing to stop saying is "I'll try," which can lead to failure and give oneself permission not to do something.
7. The speaker suggests replacing "I'll try" with a more definitive phrase, such as "I'll do it" or "I'll take care of it."
8. The phrase "I'm incredible" is suggested as a response to the question "How are you?" to transmit energy and positivity.
9. Saying "I'm incredible" can help eliminate negative people from one's life and create a more positive interaction.
10. The third thing to stop saying is "I can't," which can limit one's potential and prevent personal growth.
11. The speaker suggests finding a "why" to motivate oneself to make changes and achieve goals.
12. The fourth thing to stop saying is "It's not my fault," which can prevent taking responsibility for one's actions.
13. The speaker suggests assuming responsibility for one's life and actions, even if it's not entirely one's fault.
14. The speaker also suggests stopping saying "You more" or "Well, you know" in response to criticism or insults.
15. Laughing at oneself and not taking criticism personally can help others stop laughing at you.
16. The concept of "dynamic identity" is introduced, which means understanding that one is different from who they were yesterday.
17. The speaker has a free class that discusses the concept of dynamic identity and having a powerful "why" in life.
18. The speaker suggests keeping one's goals secret to prevent others from influencing one's motivation.
19. A video is mentioned that explains why one should stop telling people their goals.
20. The speaker, Miguel Román, is the creator of the "Secrets of Life" videos.